I don’t feel like going to therapy. I want to stay here and continue chain smoke in my room and listen to music.
I got bitten up by what I suspect are bed bugs. That is the last time I sleep on a dirty couch.
I can smoke weed again. ;)
No more panic attacks. Anxiety a bit for sure, but I’m good man.
Weed, klonopin, prozac, and cigarettes.
I hate when you’re sad for no reason; you’re with people, you’re fine, you’re happy, you’re laughing and smiling, but at the same time it almost feels like you’re not there. You keep dazing in and out of conversations, you cant focus on one single thing. And once you’re by yourself you don’t want to do anything, you’re sad and feel alone. Someone asks you what’s wrong and you want to tell them, but you don’t even know what’s wrong yourself.
"One of the most satisfying experiences I know is just fully to appreciate an individual in the same way I appreciate a sunset. When I look at a sunset … I don’t find myself saying, “Soften the orange a little on the right hand corner, and put a bit more purple in the cloud color” … I don’t try to control a sunset. I watch it with awe as it unfolds. It is this receptive, open attitude which is necessary to truly perceive something as it is."
How I cross a street
I don’t look both ways, I just walk.
When a car comes I think to myself, “you got brakes. You hit me I get money.”